I wonder if I was meant for you.

Dear friend,



I was a bad friend, I know.
But I couldn't tell.
I thought I was doing the right thing.
To care, love and be there for you always.
But it wasn't just that.
I cared for you, have you noticed?
I may have said many hurtful things to you, I didn't mean it.
I'm sorry; I hope you'll forgive me.
All I wanted was for you to be happy.
You didn't deserve him, you deserved better.
But I guess you misunderstood my sentence when I said
"He's not the one for you. He's a big fat loser"
If you read between the lines, it would've meant
"Girl, you deserve better. I don't want to see you hurt"
I was foolish to say such things.
To hurt your feelings, but those weren't my intentions.
I just didn't want him to hurt you like the other "he" did before.
All these while, I thought I was the super great friend.
But I was wrong; I didn't understand you, not at all.
Sometimes, sometimes, I just wished you knew how I felt
I've had bad times like you do too.
But I chose to put on a smile, just so you won't get all worried.
I was rather sad than mad at you.
I never wanted to scold you.
I know I've been really straight forward sometimes when I speak.
I did that so you won't have to play the guessing game.
Hey girl, if you're reading this, which I doubt you ever read my blog.
I just wanted you to know that I'm truly sorry.
It's not about just forgiving me,
I know it takes time till you start gaining trust frm me.
And I kno it's never easy just forgetting about what happened.
Take your time, I still love you.